Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher.’ – Oprah Winfrey
Every day you encounter people of all kinds. Some are positive, some are negative. Which kind of people would you want to hang out with? The negative ones who are going to put a damper on the rest of your day, or the positive ones who are going to cheer you up and put a smile on your face? I bet you’d choose the latter. After all, why would you want to ruin your own day? But how would you know who’s negative and who’s a positive thinker? As luck would have it, it’s quite easy to know which group a person belongs to.
Now, it doesn’t mean that just because a person is a negative thinker right this very moment, that they’re going to be negative thinkers for the rest of their life. Family will always remain family, no matter how negative a family member may get. And friendships, especially long-lasting ones, should be cherished. People change so there’s always the possibility that negative thinkers may turn into positive ones. If you’ve got loved ones who remain stuck in negativity, don’t lose hope. They may yet recover and go over to the other side. Perhaps you can even influence them and show them the light! So, here are ten characteristics of happy, positive people, the kind of people you should be spending time with:
- They don’t hold grudges
One characteristic that separates negative from positive thinkers is that negative thinkers hold grudges. They can’t seem to either forgive or forget. Positive thinkers, on the other hand, understand that forgiving and forgetting consumes far less energy than holding grudges.
Sometimes, however, forgetting is simply impossible especially if you’ve been wronged in a major way. But forgiving the person who has wronged or harmed you is necessary if you want to have closure and finally have peace of mind.
2. They focus on the good
Both good and bad things happen to everyone. However, positive thinkers don’ t dwell on the bad stuff. Often times, no matter how bad or catastrophic an event is, something good always seems to come out of it, or maybe even because of it.
As the saying goes, ‘Every cloud has a silver lining.’ Negative thinkers often miss the silver lining. But positive thinkers actively seek it, because they know it’s just waiting for an opportunity to present itself.
3. They aren’t afraid of failure
No one can ever say they haven’t gone through failures in life. The truth is no one is exempt from failing. However, positive people react differently to failure than their negative counterparts.
Instead of shying away from failure, they go find the reason why they failed so that they can learn from it. And the next time they attempt the same task, then they’ll be more likely to succeed.
Negative thinkers, however, will be too afraid to take risks simply because they can’t bear the thought of falling flat in their faces and getting embarrassed in front of their peers.
4. They make other people feel happy
You probably know a few people who are so comfortable in their skin, they literally glow with happiness. When you’re around them, you feel their happiness and you can feel yourself starting to get happy and energized as well. When someone’s happy, you feel happy too. Positive people seemingly have this talent of uplifting everyone around them. And you know they’re genuinely happy.
It’s quite easy to put on an act and pretend to be happy, but people are pretty good at spotting fake happiness. Genuinely happy and positive people have a different aura about them – they give off such positive vibes you just can’t help but feel positive as well!
5. They treat everyone with kindness
Positive people are kinder and more compassionate towards others. They share their blessings with the people around them and not their problems.
They willingly volunteer their time and money to help those less fortunate. Some may not have material wealth, but they still find the time to utter a kind word or two to lift somebody’s spirits.
When you are around kind, positive people, their compassion tends to rub off on you. You see the world through their eyes, and you feel compelled to help others. You build strong relationships with the people you help, and you spread the love and positivity with every random act of kindness you do.
6. They live in the present
In addition to holding grudges, negative people also don’t tend to live in the ‘now.’ They’re still so hung up on whatever has happened in the past, they can’t seem to get over it.
Positive people do have pasts, but they’re not chained to it. Instead, they’re heavily involved in what’s going on at this very moment, and they live for the present.
7. They don’t badmouth other people
Negative people, as you probably know very well, are quite fond of badmouthing other people. They’ll put on a smile on their faces when you’re in front of them, but the moment you turn your back, they’ll talk and gossip about you.
Positive people, however, make it a point to say only nice words about others. Sure, they may know a lot of bad eggs, but they don’t smear or destroy these people’s reputations just for the sake of having someone to chat with.
8. They dream big
Positive thinkers aren’t limited to their comfort zones. They aren’t scared of dreaming big. They’re not afraid of failing, so they can literally go after their dreams any way they want.
Unlike negative thinkers who doubt they’ll ever succeed at anything, positive thinkers think, well, positively. They plan out their steps so they can achieve their goals. Without negativity to hold them back, positive thinkers have the power to succeed at whatever they put their mind to.
9. They very rarely complain
When something bad happens, people will inevitably complain. However, negative thinkers are the ones who complain loudest and for far too long, maybe even after the issue has been resolved. They won’t do anything to help solve problems, but they do sure let the world know how inconvenient it’s been for them.
Positive thinkers may complain from time to time, but instead of dwelling on the issue, they seek to find a way to solve the problem. They help troubleshoot issues, they offer up suggestions, and they proactively try their hand at solving issues to make sure they don’t happen again.
10. They have positive habits
As you learned earlier, habits define an individual. Positive people have good habits, and negative people have bad habits. Building new habits take time, and undoing old and bad habits take longer. Learn from positive people – what are the habits that separate them from the negative crowd?
They most probably don’t indulge in self-destructive activities that will have an adverse effect on their health. Instead, they have developed habits that improve their productivity and further fuel their positivity.